How To Deal With Difficult People 5 Practical Tips
It was around 9.45 pm, when me and my wife were travelling in a bus.
An old man around 65 years of age was leaning on the seat where my wife was sitting. He was totally drunk and was not in a position to move an inch..
I could see my wife getting restless, as this man was leaning on her. This man was a difficult one and we had to deal with him…
Through our experience we handled him effectively, had a peaceful sleep and came to work this morning.
I am an impulsive writer and I feel that’s were you get original content as well as true value. This situation instigated me to write an article on how to deal with difficult people.
I strongly believe, you come across such difficult people in your daily life and at times wonder how to deal with those difficult people.
If I say that you are a difficult person, will you agree with me?
More often than not, you would disagree with me, because each one of us think that the other person is difficult to handle and we are easy going people.
Fair enough, let’s leave that aside and let’s see how you can handle difficult people.
1. Arguments are meant for mediocre
A few days back one of my colleague told me about a difficult person who always has got the tendency to get into an unwanted argument.
What will be your immediate knee-jerk reaction to such a person? Of course, to argue back. He did the same and he lost his entire evening trying to get across his point.
What do you do in this situation?
Its better to avoid the person who is in a argumentative mode because whatever said and done they will not agree with you.
So why start a battle that can’t be won? Only mediocre people get into an argument. A wise person like you will avoid such difficult people.
Eventually, those difficult people will be sidelined automatically and they will slowly learn from their mistakes.
So next time when someone is getting into an argument with you, just move away from that situation. Only react if they are going to assault you physically. I love Gandhian principle, but I can’t agree with all his principles. If someone hits me, then I will definitely hit him back..Whereas if someone tries to hurt me with their words then I will ignore them because I have got the option to get hurt or not. In the case of physical assault it is different. Hope you agree with me.
2. Think why God has given us 2 ears and 1 mouth
You might have read – “God has given us 2 ears and 1 mouth, because God knows that listening is twice as difficult as speaking”.
What have you learned from this statement?
Its pretty simple and straightforward..!
Half the problems will be solved if you practice active listening with difficult people. So talk less and listen more..And if you observe most of the difficult people talk more and they want somebody to listen to them. So if you want to deal them and win their heart don’t try to give your view points until they ask for it. Even if they ask be smart enough to give a wise answer that they want to hear and not what you would want to say.
3. Map is not the territory
NLP has helped me a lot in dealing with difficult people and this concept comes from NLP.
“Map is not the territory” simply means the actual reality may be totally different from your perceptions. You might be wondering how this concept is going to help you deal with difficult people.
Well, when you understand that you may not be always rite, you start accepting people and subsequently people will start accepting you. If you are willing to understand the other person’s world then you can easily connect with them by building rapport.
And if you are interested in knowing more about NLP, I am doing a free workshop for willing learners at a cost price during the first weekend of March. Please feel free to get in touch with me at firstname.lastname@example.org
4. Smart people will apply provocative and behavioral coaching on difficult people
Certain difficult people can be groomed if you are smart enough to bring about a shift in their behavioral pattern.
I am basically a difficult person because I will question anything and everything in life.
So my mentor applied the provocative love on me. He told me that if I need to achieve success in life then I should have more silence in my life. This was one reason that prompted me to get into blogging. These days I have stopped asking questions to others. However. I am finding my answers and understanding the world in a better way.
My mentor also taught me the importance of understanding the emotions of others when you handle them because only then they will relate with you and mirroring is one of the most brilliant methods in NLP.
Keen to learn??? SPEAK TO ME PLEASE!!!
5.Few capsules and I will leave it to you
Before we wind up I will give you a few more tit bits that I have used effectively.
- Seek guidance from experienced people.
- Try responding in an angry tone (act as if you are angry). Some people can be handled using this method.
- Throw that person out of your life.
- Empathize and think from their view point.
- Give them a compliment.
- Hug them..Yes, it has worked for me..!